Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn, Chris Pratt. You are hot! When did that happen?
Not that Chris Pratt hasn't always been a handsome man (he has), but now he is a full on sexy movie star action hero. Look at this picture from Jurassic World. Look at that tight T-shirt and that chiseled jaw. He looks like Indiana f--king Jones.
(But with dinosaurs, which is better. Dinosaurs always make things better).
How did we get here? Let us now track the evolution of Hot Chris Pratt. Our journey starts in 2002, when he first pinged our radar on a little show called Everwood. This is what Chris Pratt looked like:
Cute! It helped that he was playing the good-natured and goofy Bright Abbot.
(Oh hay, Emily VanCamp.)
From there it was over to The O.C. for a brief stint. Similar look (plus a rasta beanie).
And then Wanted, where Chris Pratt stole James McAvoy's girlfriend, which would have never happened because James McAvoy was really hot in that movie and Chris Pratt was just fine. Look at this baby face:
And then Bride Wars, which no one saw. Probably for the best.
And there was more where that came from in Take Me Home Tonight.
Which he starred in with his wife Anna Faris.
And not to sound too superficial (too late?) but at the time everyone was probably like, "Oh, she's so famous and so pretty! Why isn't she dating Channing Tatum or whoever?" HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED.
Here's where things started to get good: Chris Pratt had a brush with studness when he starred in Moneyball as a baseball player. Not enough to where you were like, "YEAH! CHRIS PRATT IS HOT!" but there was clearly untapped potential.
And then NO THANK YOU he covers it all up with a fat suit in What's Your Number?
And you just don't know about Chris Pratt. Maybe he's hot, maybe's he's not, you can't tell anymo--ABS!
ABS THIGHS UNDERWEAR TRIS BIS PECS SCRUFF CHRIS PRAAAAATTTTTTT
They even had to write in a line into Parks and Recreation explaining why Andy—formerly fat, slobby Andy—suddenly had a bangin' body. We'd like to take this moment to also direct your attention towards this photo from the set of Parks and Rec that proves that Chris Pratt is a DILF.
Which brings us to a fully evolved Hot Chris Pratt. This is the gift we've been given:
Guardians of the Galaxy, in theaters August 1, 2014. Buy your tickets now!
This is a movie star:
This is a sex symbol:
This is just an adorable picture:
This is Hot Chris Pratt:
More, please.